And Jesus said to him, "Foxes have holes and birds of the
air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to
lay His head." {Mathew 8:20}
It's sort a strange thing to be in-between homes. We moved out of our Georgia house about two weeks ago and we're in the process of house searching in New York {where our next assignment with the Army is}. So we're currently "homeless" for what will likely be a month and half of transition time before getting settled again. We made one short trip to Fort Drum to house hunt. Step #1 was getting on the wait-list for on post housing. Step #2 was coordinating with some local property managers to look at rentals off base. And, assuming #1 and #2 didn't yield a house, step #3 was viewing homes on the market.
Even if you're not acquainted with cross country moves {this being our ninth in the past 5.5 years of marriage}, you may be able to imagine the sense of urgency that comes with living out of a suitcase with a limited amount of time to find a home. Talk about wanting to get down to business. Here's a quick re-cap of our three day house hunting trip last week:
Day 1.
>Completed the drive from VA to NY with a toddler in tow and found a hotel.
> Adjusted attempted to adjust to the extreme temperature difference between Upstate NY {Canada minus 29 miles}, and Southern Georgia.
> Had already gotten on the on-post housing list and knew we were in for about a 50 day wait time if their estimate was correct.
Day 2: Rentals
> Property 1: Two small, too dark, too dingy, too many crazy paint colors throughout the house, and an unfinished basement laundry area with ceilings so low that I had to duck to walk over to the washer and dryer.
> Property 2: A second floor unit far from base that was much too small with a very old kitchen.
> Property 3: A run-down dilapidated house with ugly wall paper peeling off of the walls, no bedrooms for children upstairs, and a kitchen that- I kid you not- was so bad that the linoleum flooring was peeling up and had visible moisture stains and mold growing on it. According to the property manager, they were "maybe" going to replace it. The rest of the kitchen was just as bad.
> Property 4: An old "temporary-living" style apartment in a complex located in a not so inviting part of town that we thought we'd use as a last resort for month to month rent in case nothing else worked out- only to find out that they do yearly leases only.
{Insert the anti-climactic waaamp-waaaaaaaamp sound bite here}. Let's just say we went back to our hotel room feeling less than optimistic.
Day 3: Real Estate
Viewed a handful of homes and saw a couple of true gems! We were hesitant about the prospect of buying, but at this point we had nothing to lose. We saw the house we'd been looking at online for the past six or eight months {long before we knew we were definitely moving to New York}. And, believe it or not, this house turned out to be the favorite for both of us. And if I may go one step farther, my dream house. So, after a lot of number crunching, market analysis, long term investment planning, and maybe a few giddy dances, we're in the beginning phase of making an offer on this home. But most important of all, we're praying that God either opens or closes this door for us. This is only my dream home if it's in line with His purposes. Otherwise, I don't want anything to do it with it. I praise Jesus that He is ultimately in control of our lives and that His perfect plan will come to pass.
What I'm Really Getting At.
Speaking of which, Jesus is the real point of this post. Earlier this morning He convicted me about my way of thinking and He reminded of His own life on earth- "And Jesus said to him, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay His head." {Mathew 8:20} I have to confess that I was so quick to turn up my nose at the rentals we saw, thinking our family was too good to live in anything that "sub-par". And while it's true that they would certainly be a step down from what we're used to, it's arrogant to think myself above them. Why? Because Jesus, the Almighty God in the flesh, the righteous Creator of the Universe, left His own perfect home to come live in the ghettos of our sin fallen world. And not just to live here, but to save us from our own sin by trading places with us on the cross. We are the ones who've turned our backs on Him and we are the ones who deserve to die and follow our hand chosen master, Satan, to eternal damnation. Apart from the saving grace of God in the lives of undeserving sinners like me, none of us can stand justified in the presence of the righteous, Holy God. Yet He loved us so much that He was willing to subject Himself to absolute servitude, poverty, and the excruciating, humiliating death of crucifixion that He might pay the debt we owed and give us the rightousness that He demonstrated in His sinless life.
And here I am, a recipient of this totally unmerritted grace, unwilling to humble myself enough to consider living in a less than "ideal" home for a few short years. But before I address my own sin, a couple of things about our gracious God: 1) I know that He wants good things for us. Of Him it is said: "He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?" {Romans 8:32} "All things" does not mean financial or physical comfort in every circumstance, but it's clear that He's already paid the highest price to provide for our most vital, eternal needs. And 2) I'm not advocating that it's sinful to desire a decent home fit to nurture and flourish our family. Women of God are called to be "homemakers" in Titus 2:5, which implies that cultivating a clean, orderly home for the benefit of the entire family is to be a high priority. So if we're blessed with the ability to afford or acquire a home without moldy kitchen floors, praise God. But if not, "in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." {1 Thessalonians 5:18} And this is attitude that I need to be ready to practice.
At the end of the day, it's not our material possessions that matter most, but our heart. I'll readily admit that practicing genuine, sacrificial humility is hard. My flesh has such strong propensities for self-gain, and I don't think I can make it a single day without the desire to indulge my own selfishness. So I'm trying to repent of my self-centeredness and remember our precious Lord, who lived the most loving, compassionate, truthful, and fruitful life ever lived for our sakes- even through periods of homelessness and hunger.
We hope and pray that He will bless us with a home that we can use primarily for His work and His glory. If it's the dream home that we have our sights set on, praise God. If it's something "lesser", praise God. Wherever He takes us and whatever He provides, His will and glory are our greatest aims!
